There is no easier or better way to say that this month sucked without just saying “this month sucked.” So. This month sucked. Here’s a summary of things that have nothing to do with anything other than what I’ve done with myself in the context of, like, entertainment. Or culture. Or something.

(But let’s be real: I watched Criminal Minds on Netflix every night because I felt too sad and hopeless to do anything else and that is a show that requires very little intellectual engagement. Sometimes I got up and made toast. I could’ve made wonderbread toast with jif, but I made an effort there: seeded rye and fig jam. I’m trying.)

I finished Allegheny Front by Matthew Neill Null and was thoroughly disappointed. I don’t think it would’ve been so bad had I not gone into it with high expectations based on reviews comparing it to the very best of West Virginia short stories. Breece Pancake this was not. What is, though?

I’m working on Slouching Towards Bethlehem by Joan Didion and a pamphlet or two about resisting fascism (this would be funny if it, like, wasn’t). I’ve also dog-eared the selected George Oppen and the collected Robert Creeley.

I never finish anything.

I don’t know how to listen to music anymore either, apparently, because this month sounded a lot like last year. God. I’m ashamed, almost.

But only almost.

Father John Misty – Pure Comedy

The day this song came out, I was mid-crisis involving a “co-worker” who seemed intent on using me as his personal assistant/female of choice to creep on and I had decided that I was just going to close and lock my office door, whether or not that was a thing I was allowed to do. I think this song ended up with so many plays on my last.fm charts because I dissociated in front of my computer with repeat-1 on and didn’t notice. oopsie.

 

Tegan and Sara – The Ocean

Sometimes it is 2010 in my mind.

 

Xiu Xiu – Unclouded Sky

Jesus, I don’t know.

 

Quicksand – Thorn in My Side

This makes sense. This is loud enough.

 

Pissed Jeans – Cafeteria Food

See above note re: Father John Misty. Read these lyrics. I dunno, man. Life got real hard to deal with for a minute there. I needed a laugh.